Best Obituary Ever Written
Last comment by timeontarget 10 months, 2 weeks ago.

Take Me To Post Comment Form

I hope it's okay for me to post this here because this has to be the best Obituary ever written. I cannot believe the nick names of his girlfriends were allowed in the obituary.

William Freddie McCullough - BLOOMINGDALE - The man. The myth. The legend. Men wanted to be him and women wanted to be with him. William Freddie McCullough died on September 11, 2013. Freddie loved deep fried Southern food smothered in Cane Syrup, fishing at Santee Cooper Lake, Little Debbie Cakes, Two and a Half Men, beautiful women, Reeses Cups and Jim Beam. Not necessarily in that order. He hated vegetables and hypocrites. Not necessarily in that order. He was a master craftsman who single -handedly built his beautiful house from the ground up. Freddie was also great at growing fruit trees, grilling chicken and ribs, popping wheelies on his Harley at 50 mph, making everyone feel appreciated and hitting Coke bottles at thirty yards with his 45. When it came to floor covering, Freddie was one of the best in the business. And he loved doing it. Freddie loved to tell stories. And you could be sure 50% of every story was true. You just never knew which 50%. Marshall Matt Dillon, Ben Cartwright and Charlie Harper were his TV heroes. And he was the hero for his six children: Mark, Shain, Clint, Brandice, Ashley and Thomas. Freddie adored the ladies. And they adored him. There isn't enough space here to list all of the women from Freddie's past. There isn't enough space in the Bloomingdale phone book. A few of the more colorful ones were Momma Margie, Crazy Pam, Big Tittie Wanda, Spacy Stacy and Sweet Melissa (he explained that nickname had nothing to do with her attitude). He attracted more women than a shoe sale at Macy's. He got married when he was 18, but it didn't last. Freddie was no quitter, however, so he gave it a shot two more times. It didn't work out with any of the wives, but he managed to stay friends with them and their parents. In between his many adventures, Freddie appeared in several films including The Ordeal of Dr. Mudd, A Time for Miracles, The Conspirator, Double Wide Blues and Pretty Fishes. When Freddie took off for that pool party in the sky, he left behind his sons Mark McCullough, Shain McCullough and his wife Amy, Clint McCullough and his wife Desiree, and Thomas McCullough and his wife Candice; and his daughters Brandice Chambers and her husband Michael, Ashley Cooler and her husband Justin; his brothers Jimmie and Eddie McCullough; and his girlfriend Lisa Hopkins; and seven delightful grandkids. Freddie was killed when he rushed into a burning orphanage to save a group of adorable children. Or maybe not. We all know how he liked to tell stories. Savannah Morning News September 14, 2013 Please sign our Obituary Guest Book at savannahnow.com/obituaries.


Published in Savannah Morning News on September 14, 2013.

http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/savannah/obituary.aspx?n=william-mccullough&pid=166950349





Latest Activity: Sep 16, 2013 at 12:12 PM


Bookmark and Share
Forward This Blog
Print Blog
More Blogs by mountain
Send mountain a Message
Report Abuse


Blog has been viewed (444) times.

JimmyMack commented on Monday, Sep 16, 2013 at 12:20 PM

Yeah. Saw that one too, Mountain. Reads like a Lewis Grizzard type obit. William musta been one hell of a guy!

mountain commented on Monday, Sep 16, 2013 at 12:43 PM

I have never heard of him until I checked the obits. I still cannot believe how they listed one of his girlfriends, Big Tittie Wanda.

Georgeann7 commented on Monday, Sep 16, 2013 at 13:03 PM

Gotta love it! :)

sebekm commented on Monday, Sep 16, 2013 at 16:11 PM

He must have wrote it himself.....

Funkentelecky commented on Monday, Sep 16, 2013 at 20:41 PM

That seems to be very possible Chief. What a way to be thinking out of the box!

timeontarget commented on Tuesday, Sep 17, 2013 at 05:58 AM

I read this Saturday in the obit section of the Savannah morning news.

Later that day I called my son to make sure that he read it.

I was told yesterday that it had gone worldwide.

I personally would like my obit to have a lighthearted flavor.

Sounds like the man got the most out of his life.

JimmyMack commented on Tuesday, Sep 17, 2013 at 07:46 AM

It was William had six children and they all signed off on it. They led the funeral procession riding 6 Harleys.

JimmyMack commented on Tuesday, Sep 17, 2013 at 07:48 AM

IT WAS WILLIAM'S SON THAT WROTE IT.

sebekm commented on Tuesday, Sep 17, 2013 at 09:26 AM

Oh - okay - but I still think he must have been inspired by the old man.

mountain commented on Thursday, Sep 19, 2013 at 08:12 AM

I shared this on facebook the day it came out in The Savannah Morning News and yesterday I saw where this went viral around the world.

timeontarget commented on Thursday, Sep 19, 2013 at 15:42 PM

Little wonder that it went viral.

It appeared to be absolutely honest.

Many of us have traveled similar paths in our journey through this life.


Log In to post comments.

Previous blog entries by mountain
 
Same Old Same Old
March 28, 2014
I stayed away from this blog for over six months because I was sick and tired of politics just to return to see the same old crap.
Read More »
 
Christmas Trees as Holiday Trees
November 04, 2013
Apparently the White House referred to Christmas Trees as Holiday Trees for the first time this year, which prompted CBS presenter, Ben Stein, to present this piece which I would like to share with you. The following was written by Ben Stein and recited by him on CBS Sunday Morning ...
Read More »
 
SEC
September 30, 2013
Welcome to the new SEC, ladies and gentlemen. The days of kicking a field goal and winning 6-3 in overtime are over. The days of defense wins championships and it all begins up front on the defensive line and we dare you to run on us have been replaced by ...
Read More »
 
Charlie Daniels
July 02, 2013
I think that if anything exemplifies the overt prejudice and determination of the American media to report only the news that suits their social and political interests and concept of what does and does not fit their agenda, it’s the totally overblown coverage of something Paula Deen said 20 years ...
Read More »
 
Paula Deen
June 28, 2013
I am not a big Paula Deen fan but I found this interesting. I also saw on the news this morning where her book sales are soaring. Deen's attorney: “You have never heard Paula make a racist remark, have you?” Plaintiff Lisa Jackson: “Not heard it,” Jackson replied. “You have ...
Read More »
 
[View More Blogs...]





 
Powered by
Morris Technology